College Help Part 4/4

This is the final section of college help from one particular brainstorm session. Pass along these tips to people who may like them.

10. See if you can find a house. Someone who lives nearby, a family at your local church who will have you over, some place that is a home with a mailing address and a couch where you can hang if dorm life is overwhelming or stinky. It could happen. If the house has a dog, all the better in my opinion. It’s weird how much you miss house stuff when you live in a dorm. 

11. Do your thing. You might not know what that is. Now is the time to figure it out. By that I mean that the window is open, but don’t jump through it if you’re not ready. Try stuff out because maybe you are the 6AM run, shower, go to class girl. Maybe you’re the girl who camps out at the table Monday night and does her homework for the week. Maybe you’re going to be the “big man on campus” as it were who everyone knows. Develop an identity and allow it to change. If you do the 6 AM run thing once and never do that again, well then okay. If you love that, then keep doing it. 

     11a. Your morning routine will make or break you. If you want coffee and a bagel for your 8AM class, you better get to the coffee shop before 7:56 if you’re interested in being on time to class. Maybe that’s not super important to you. Try brewing coffee in your room if your dorm allows and your roommates and your pocket book (to people use those, is that a thing?) will thank you. I got a used mini fridge from friends who had graduated and it was great to have the option of storing cheese sticks or other snacks in there. If you’re cool with rolling out of bed and into class, then don’t stress that everyone else is getting ready and looking nice. If you want that, then make that your jam. If you hate being late, then plan ahead. If you like eating breakfast, plan ahead. If you love being late and hate breakfast food, you should still think about setting an alarm. 

     11b. Study habits. If you’re like me, you rarely studied in high school. By study, I mean “hey that test is Wednesday so Monday and Tuesday I am going to review the material by re-reading my notes, taking new notes on the text, quizzing myself, writing flashcards, etc.” I did do that occasionally, but not consistently. When I showed up at college, I didn’t really know how to do that. I figured I could just listen in class and succeed. Sometimes that works but not always. If you don’t know how to study, you gotta try some stuff. Be realistic about what is working and what is not working. Study with other people, study alone, study in silence, study to music, write it down 12 times, say it out loud, make up a song. Spend your time on things you don’t know. When it comes to test time, trust your gut. If you second guess yourself and you did have the right answer but you erased it, you will be bummed. 

12. Finally, safety. I have attended two colleges, both private, Christian universities and neither of them was incident free. Violence happens everywhere, but it definitively more likely to happen in certain places to certain people. If you are going for a run, tell someone where you are going and when you expect to be back. Go with someone on that run. Walk in well-lit areas. I never know if it’s better advice to be talking to someone on the phone while you walk back to your dorm because then if you were attacked you could scream and that person would hear you, or to not be on your phone because then all your attention is on your surroundings. If someone says “I’ll text you when I get there” and they don’t, call them. If you know how to use it and feel comfortable, carry pepper spray. Be willing to call campus police to pick you up. I never did it but I heard it happens. If you are consuming alcohol, have a sober buddy who has your best interest at heart and is dedicated to getting home safely. It’s a tough balance between being constantly terrified and never considering that there may be danger. Again, trust your gut. If you have a bad feeling about the dude standing by the door, go out a different door. If the only person in the elevator gives you the creeps, wait for the elevator to take them to their stop before you call it again. Don’t let the desire to be considered polite put you in danger. If you have a bad feeling, don’t ignore it.

Whew! I hope some or all of those tips are helpful. 

I don’t love saying “do this” “don’t do this” because you’re an adult and can make your own decisions, but it’s more concise than saying “if you want to, you can do this thing." My apologies if that bothered you throughout these tips. It kind of bothered me while I wrote it.