Revelations in Psalms

Sharing a spiritual connection is tough and that stinks. I believe that sharing insights from Scripture can bring people closer. Reading Scripture is also a personal connection with the reader and the Lord. Sharing that personal connection can be scary. But hey, this is the Internet and the rules here are different.

Honestly, this year has not been great. It's been a struggle overall. I was a few days behind on my Bible reading and so today I backtracked. One of the chapters was Psalm 13.
I have been feeling down and this Psalm absolutely spoke to me. I am all about the NLT,  but maybe you're not. Here's the link to the NLT but on this website you can change it to whatever translation you want. 

If you're having a rough time or even if you're not, take 5 minutes to read this one. It's only 6 verses.
It is SO good. 
Happy Tuesday. 

Christian Rap

In case the title didn't put you off and you are still reading this post, I want you to know until about five months ago I never gave Christian rap a shot.
I had heard of Lecrae (one of the better known Christian rappers) and had no interest in the subject.
This summer I worked with some of the best people ever at Arrowhead Bible Camp. When dishes were being done in the kitchen, the music was blaring. Some days it was Disney, some days it was your typical Casting Crowns or Barlow Girl, but other days it was rap. 

It used to annoy me. A lot. One day I got to talking with Tanner and he explained what a cool way it is to hear the Truth in a new medium. Huh. I hadn't thought of it like that. He explained that for non-Christian people who like rap and don't like to read, the work of a Christian rap artist may be one of their only exposures to the Truth of God's saving grace. Tanner also quoted some famous guy who basically said "Why should the devil get all the good music?"

Andy Mineo

By the end of the summer, me tolerating the music became me enjoying the music and even busting a move or two. Do rap fans say "busting a move"? I didn't run out and buy a bunch of albums, but I didn't roll my eyes and wait for the song to be over. 

Once I was back on campus, I started seeing advertisements for Andy Mineo, a Christian rap artist. The concert was $1 and who can beat that. He spoke in chapel on Friday about "Rhythm and Reconciliation" but more on the 

This was our 2nd view. Blegh. 

reconciliation part. I went with Jess to the concert and we had a lot of fun! We danced like no one was watching although they probably should have been because we had the best moves in town. 

Standing on the floor- 1st view. No bueno.

Then we moved to a great spot!

I know you can't see it, but there's a guy mopping up the floor in that photo on the right. When Andy came out, he slipped and fell flat on his face! Then a minute later he said it was the most embarrassing way he has ever started a show.  


 That photographer was on stage the whole night and was all up in their faces. So annoying. 

 

These girls were rocking the whole concert and got on stage when it was finished to jam a little more.

I had a really great time rocking with Jessica. And hey, who can beat a $1 concert? 

The Booyah Run Around

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I have my first class at 9:25. For me, it takes more work to wake up at two different times during the week, so I always wake up at 8:00. This leaves me with some extra time in the morning because this girl doesn't require an hour+ of primping time. See that photo? Not me. 

Today, I spent part of that time doing my "Eat This Book" devotional. Since I was in my room, I had my Bible readily available and read the Good Book instead of the digitized version. I checked off the chapters on the app and when I am done for the day it says "Congrats! You've finished ___% of the plan!" and I like that. Why do people turn that option off? I love knowing how far I have gone. Today, it told me I had completed 2.5% and I know in the grand scheme of things, that's not a lot. In a treatment program, that's a teeny success rate. In grade on a test, that's definitely failing. But making progress on this plan is different. Looking at that percentage says "You only have 2.5% of the information in this book. Keep reading tomorrow!" I can't wait until it says 10%, and on down the line. Doing a little bit everyday keeps me grounded (except when I forget) and I can absolutely see a shift for the better when I do read the chapters for the day and when I don't.

Genesis 29 has so much in it! I should find someone on campus to sit down and chat about it because I need somebody with some scholarly knowledge. The whole running up to your cousin, kissing her, and crying is a mystery to me. It's so romantic that his 7 years of labor seemed like only a few days. Good try, Nicholas Sparks but the Bible got you beat. And then plot twist: it's Leah in the marriage bed, not Rebekah. Verse 30 breaks my heart: "he loved her more than Leah" but God was looking out for Leah. I don't really understand verse 35 either. There's got to be a Biblical scholar on this campus! (joke, there is definitely a Biblical scholar)

So I read a little bit and then went to class. Statistics for Social Sciences. I was already in a pretty good mood. I even answered some questions in class! They weren't like difficult, what did you get for this answer kind of questions but the point is I participated. As my friend Andrew Bruce would say, "BOOYAH."

Then instead of waiting in the dumb, long line, I called my mom and chatted it up with her. That was nice. Thanks Mom. I love ya.

I had a quick lunch and then headed to my mailbox. My keyboard cover came! I lurrrve it. It's makes my keys not so clicky-clacky and it makes me wonder how I ever used my computer without it. That's a little dramatic, but that's how much I love getting stuff in the mail. I'm still expecting one more thing in the mail and that gives me a smile. 

Social Psych was fine, I even participated a little in that class. I even raised my hand and said "can you explain that again? I'm not sure I understand." And then when she was re-explaining,  I heard pencils scratching and keys clicking which means other people didn't get it too. Again, I say, Booyah. We watched a really sad video about Noble Doss that used the dramatic music from Remember the Titans and I wanted to cry. Whatever. Don't judge. 

Finally, I went to the blood drive and I told the lady that the blood pressure cuff stresses me out so usually it shows up that my BP is high. My BP was 132/88 which is only a little high. My pulse was pretty normal (78 bpm) so that's cool. THEN I had to answer the questions about leaving the country. I even asked the girl when I signed up if going to the Dominican Republic within the last year was an issue. She said she didn't know. Bummer.
I went through the finger prick, the blood pressure cuff, and the questions on the computer.
Then 2 people came back, 1 in training and the very sweet, southern lady who was training her.

I couldn't recall the name of the town we were in while we were in the DR, so they brought out the Atlas! No way. Who knew they had that at the blood drive? They were very patient with me because they appreciated me being patient with the new girl. As they searched for information in the computer system, I told the supervisor about my unfortunate experience about the last time I tried to give blood. The woman apologized that it was such a bad experience and told me that it's okay to ask for a supervisor or something like that because they want me to have a good experience. This picture was from last time. YUCK. not fun. absolutely no Booyah here. 
Bottom line, I couldn't donate blood but I am no longer a malaria risk after Jan 6, 2012. booyah. 

Finally, the day ended with me getting a "Sticky Bun Latte" that I have been eyeing since the fall flavors came to McConn. It was totally worth the zillion calories. Tasty and autumnal and SO GOOD. I will probably get it one more time before they run out of all the flavors/before winter stuff moves in but that's plenty. 

Weekend Review

This is not an extensive weekend review, but some things must be shared with the world.
I went to my suitemate's house for Friday night and Saturday. Mostly, I was there to help with making invitations for her wedding.

Joy (the future bride) drove me and Kailynne to her house. That night, we went to her high school's football game. We watched Joy's fiance's brother (got that?) play.

The band did this amazing, avant-garde performance with the dance team. They had these TERRIBLE costumes, which are really hard to see in the photos. Think green and blue unitards, with one side with a skirt on it, and the other side with sequins and insanity.
The performance included clips from Dr. King's speeches being mixed together and played over speakers, mirroring one another (like you and me face each other and move our hands so it looks like we are looking in a mirror) and insane poses. People sat on the ground and there was a giant, inflatable globe. WIERD. I thoroughly enjoyed it.

This one has a great view of the inflatable globe

This video makes it seem deceptively normal. It was really strange!

They also had really funny posters at the game. Check out this one of the cheerleaders:

And this one: It's a public high school, but they have Bible verses on their posters. Small town USA, I guess.

Saturday morning we saw Joy's brother play soccer:

They didn't win which was sad. The game went into two overtimes and then finally a shoot out! 

 That was pretty exciting for me. The referee made like 5 questionable calls, so the fans were pretty upset about that. It was interesting to watch it from an outside perspective. I had no allegiance to either team but I do understand the game. Also, the sun was all up on us, so I got a little sunburned. Boo.

The rest of Saturday was spent assembling invitations. Three other girls came for just the day on Saturday so I got to chat it up with them. The 5 of us made about 250 invitations. Joy is having around 500 people at her wedding. WOW! Also, the Friday before she's having a rehearsal reception party with like 150 people. Her extended family is really big and her family knows everybody in town.

It was nice to come back on Saturday night and be in the suite with just Kailynne and me. Erin had gone home for the weekend too.
Overall, it was a good weekend of getting to see how another family does stuff and show Joy some love through that act of service.

Tough Blogging

This has been the week of half started blog posts.
Every idea I have kind of fades away mid-thought. I can't get anything to stick around long enough to make a real post.
It's a little frustrating.
Earlier today, I found myself really wanting to spend time day dreaming.
I have this perfect little red notebook (Wal-Mart buy) and I filled the lines with things that were on my mind for 15 minutes between tasks.

Here's the list:

• Burgundy colored skinny jeans
• A lip color that works for me
• High & low skirts
• Expensive headphones and when I would use them
• NAPS
• How much energy it requires to get ready
• Crunchy leaves
• All the reading I have to do
• Firday night football
• Snuggly blankets
• Injustice
• GOOD coffee
• Brunette or blonde?
• Boys who are dressed better than me
• Headaches
• New, less intense backpack
• Chicago skyline
• How nervous I get online shopping
• Fun decks of cards

It did help my brain to write this list. 

Now I have to study, whatever that means. For me, it means staring at my notebook and trying to make sense of the things I rapidly scribbled. Blegh. 

Laundry

When I was at Wal-Mart, I found these dryer sheets:

I basically don't need perfume any more. Also, my room is right next to the laundry room this year so I'm much more likely to do my laundry. That's a little sad and a lotta true. 

Even if you don't buy these bad boys, give them a sniff next time you're in the "chemicals to clean your clothes with" aisle.

Challenging Chapel

I have loved chapel so far. My philosophy prof from last year (Dave Ward) spoke on Friday. I missed him! He is fantastic.

He spoke about church and how it’s really not about us. Shifting the focus away from church meeting our personal desires can make church a lot more enjoyable.  He talked about how we don’t like the style of the church or we are frustrated with the lack of compassion and social action of the church. He also said that you are God’s gift to the church for whatever you’re frustrated about. It is your gift, your burden and passion that you likely see as lacking in the church and you are the church’s resource. Woah. Think about that. What do you see as missing from the church? Can you fill that hole?

Will you?

The issue is that you’re frustrated about the lack of (fill in the blank) so then you leave and then the resource (you) has left and the issue in the church still exists.

Dave looked at Hebrews 10 and said there’s so much there, we could never cover it, even if we had a month worth of full-length sermons. He said he asks himself 3 questions every time he goes to church.

#1 Where’s God going to show up? It may not be where you think. Maybe one verse in the passage will really be highlighted to you. Ask God to show up for you and then be looking for it. Dave said each time he is surprised.

#2 How can I provoke the church to loving action? If the church isn’t active enough, it’s our fault. The imagery in the passage is poking at coals that have died down. We have to provoke one another, challenge one another to love deeply and be positively changed by one another. That looks different depending on who you are and how much effort you're willing to put in. 

#3 Can You (God) show me two people that need my encouragement today? Dave said each Sunday, God has not failed him on this one. God is pretty awesome that way. 

Bottom line, there has to be a mental change. Church is not about if you like the style of music or if the preacher is dressed in a way that makes you feel comfortable. It’s about refusing to abandon the local meeting of the church (Hebrews 10:25). 

Dave used the analogy of the Navy SEALS who do not let each other ring the “I give up” bell and do not leave one another behind. He asked us to see each other as comrades in this spiritual warfare and not let each other down. We should be spurring each other on in love and pushing towards the prize as one, not as individuals.

God absolutely spoke through Dave in chapel. 

Week One, Year Two

That's one week of classes down and just a few more to go. Just kidding. Really, this week went pretty well. Here's more detail than you ever wanted if you've never been to college and a great reminder of what college classes are really like if you have already been. 

Psychopharmacology: My prof (sidebar: his name is Dr. Richard Hooker. I'm sure people have been snickering for years. Poor guy.) is very compassionate. He seems to really care about what he teaches and it makes me see it as important. He was honest that the first three chapters are going to be a pain but it will be more routine after that. These first few chapters are chemistry, how cells and other things are made up on a molecular level, how drugs enter into your system: intramuscular, intravenous, subcutaneous, topical, intraperitoneal [typically animals only], and via inhalation (plus two other whackado ones) and the advantages (and disadvantages) of each type. There are 5 steps from administration to excretion and he was very clear this is key information for the course.

Thank you!! Sometimes (see: a lot of times) in math, I wouldn't really understand something but I thought "Alright, I'll just get through this chapter test and I'll do better next chapter" but then the next chapter was that concept amped up. And I thought "Shoot! Why didn't I just learn that one thing well in the first place. Dang it." Also, I hate math. 

Anyway, the point is, I appreciate that he points out things that are important and doesn't do it in an obnoxious way. Once we get through the first couple chapters, we are moving on to individual drugs and studying their short term effects, long term effects, and withdraw symptoms/risks. Sweet!

Addictions Theory: I have this class right after psychopharm with the same prof in the same room. It has it’s advantages, like being able to chat with him in the interim (his young daughter plays soccer, making us kind of insta-buddies) but sometimes is awkward when kids are coming in for the second class. Today, one of them said the term “double header” in reference to the class schedule and I thought that was pretty accurate.

Addictions theory is interesting to me as a concept. Depending on what you believe caused the addiction, your treatment method will change. In the early stages of treating alcoholics, sometimes they would bleed them or blister their ankles or induce sweating. Yuck. Things have shifted since then.

Minority Group Relations: I sort of made a fool of myself the first day of class. I will take the time to tell that story because it made me red in the face and sharing that kind of hilarity is sort of the point of the Internet. My prof called a student and that student was to share their name, grade, major, hometown, their favorite animal and why. 

I’m the kind to plan this thing in my head and anticipate any kind of response from the class as best as possible, rehearsing meticulously in my head until it’s my turn. As soon as he got to G last names, my heart was pounding. Also this is why I hate being randomly called on in class. I had an answer for when it was my turn and plenty of time to prepare saying facts about myself that I have known for a long time and felt my blood pressure rising. Imagine how stressed I am when I get called on when my hand is not raised about things I’m just taking in for the first time. NOT cool.

Anyway, he gets to me and I say “Hi, my name is Bethany, I’m from the North Shore of Chicago, I’m a sophomore psych major with an addictions counseling minor and my favorite animal is a sea turtle because, uh, they’re pretty cool” or something very close to that. My prof says “Oh okay, have you ever (short pause) swum with sea turtles” and out of my mouth comes the following statement “I don’t think swum is a word.” And the whole class busts out laughing. 

Now, people had laughed in good taste at the responses other people gave but he had to let the laughter die down before he could respond by saying “As I said it, I questioned if it was a word or not and I was pretty sure it wasn’t.” Hopefully he sees me as well educated but not a snob. Shoot. I could have been a lot snottier in the way I said it, but I kind of caught myself as the words were coming out of my mouth. It likely wasn’t that big of a deal, but this is my blog and my brain kind of spills out on this web page in a very non-CSI kind of way.

All of this to say I like my prof and his teaching style. The class subject makes me uncomfortable but he said that would happen. I don’t have a realistic grasp on how much work it will be over the course of the semester. Only a few people in the room are psych majors because this course can count as a gen. ed. credit, so that’s a nice shift. Pretty much all the rest of my classes are psych majors, psych and addictions counseling double majors, or addictions counseling majors.

Statistics for Social Sciences: One of the very first things my prof said about herself was that she doesn’t like people to use laptops in class. She will allow it but she has seen studies and it doesn’t help you learn. She also told the class in rather short order that she talks very, very quickly. NOT a great combination. We are doing video projects in that class, like read a script and be creative. I hate that kind of thing. One of our classes was shortened because of our academic convocation and she whipped through the material in 30 minutes and was “so pleased we got through it all!” but I was very lost and not pleased at all. I have a feeling that class is going to require a lot of brainpower. I’m also not super pleased I have to take another college math class but I know I have to do well because this is a prerequisite for a lot of classes for my major.

Social Psychology: I have the same prof for this class as for stats and both of these classes are T/TH. That sort of stinks because my hand is gonna cramp up like it’s nobody’s business. The first class was mostly spent discussing the minute discrepancies between social psychology and sociology. I was not getting a great vibe if you have to explain why this subject deserves to be separate even though they’re pretty stinking close. To be fair, this was the 5^th and final new classroom I had to enter at the beginning of this week, so my “be open minded!” energy may have run out by then. 

The talking fast bothers me because I know I can listen and process that fast. The issue is that I cannot remember all that stuff without writing it down and because she talks quickly, it’s a lot more stuff to store in my brain than it would be in a classroom where the prof takes a breath. I realize I’m being a little unfair but that’s my prerogative.

I know I have to give my Tuesday/Thursday prof a little more grace. I don’t want to hate 2/5 classes! It’s been an overwhelming week.I have a much more encouraging post coming on how much I enjoyed chapel on Friday. Until then, happy weekend!

Daily Devos

I'm pretty terrible at daily devotions. If I think to do them, it's late and then I don't want to get up or it's in the middle of something that I can't get away from. 
It is disturbing how laziness has negatively affected my relationship with God. 
That's another topic for another day.

Today, I felt convicted in a good way to read the Book. Not in a fire and brimstone way, but in a "hey, that's something I really want to do today" kind of way. 

About a month ago, I started the "Eat this Book" one year Bible plan and have been inconsistent at best. I use youversion.com and the plan is right on the site. I can access it from my phone too, giving me absolutely no excuse. I'm not really doing it for the satisfaction of finishing in one year, but I would like to read the whole Bible in a good amount of time. It feels a little silly to me that there are parts of this instruction manual for life I've never read!

The plan gives you a few (3-5) chapters a day of one book and then a psalm. Today was a lot of genealogy (who needs baby name books) and this little wonder:

Psalm 3:5-6
I lay down and slept,
    yet I woke up in safety,
    for the Lord was watching over me.
⁶ I am not afraid of ten thousand enemies
    who surround me on every side.

I am safe. I don't have 10,000 enemies. A lot of my fear and anxiety comes from inside my own head. What a blessing to have the God of the Universe watching out for me. Even if I had 10,000 enemies, He could protect me from them. 

If you're as bad at daily devotionals as I am, don't give up. Find a plan that works for you & a plan that you like the layout. I can absolutely tell the difference in my attitude if I do or don't read that day. 

First Day of School

Part of my wishes I was one of those people who didn't freak out.
I always get nervous on the first day of school. Like, stomach in knots, jittery, shaking a little nervous.

It's the first day of school and I'm trying to consciously calm myself down. I don't know exactly where in the building my classes are, but I know where buildings are. I know where the chapel is. I know where my room is. I know where the food is. That's the important stuff, right?

I feel great. Nervous, but great. By the end of the day, I'll be more calm. By the end of tomorrow, I'll be even more calm because each of my classes will have happened once.
Right now, I'm trying to stop my heart from pounding out of my chest.

I got up early and I.T. fixed my computer problems (I swear, they work magic there) before class. That put me at ease already this morning but now I'm sitting outside of my first (and second) classroom and the nerves are back on edge.

Here goes nothing.

Moving Forward

When moving from thing to thing as quickly as I do, there's a very small window of opportunity where I can delve out my feelings for something. For example, when we were in San Francisco, I was totally ready to write about it and totally without wifi. Bummer.
Now, I am unpacking unpacking unpacking (aka chatting, unpacking, avoiding) and my brain has moved past vacation brain. However, there are still some sweet photos I want you to see. Therefore, the rest of the information about my vacation will be done in this photo dump. Enjoy.
If you hate nature and photos of trees, skip this post. Seriously.
Here's a tip- click a photo and use your arrow keys so the photos come up quickly. Boom.

From the farmer's market

Troubadour. He was fantastic. 

Check out the rings on that thing

This man did the most awkward pose to get this photo. Thanks!

So many bones!

This is where our bad driving adventure began. Yuck. the photos end there.